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Songs of Self​-​Loathing

by Raccoon City

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1.
I’m at the bottom rung of the social ladder, Another useless body left to fill up the crowds. No aspirations, no dreams. A guilty coward bowed on his knees. Not a matter of opinion just a well known fact. A lifeless husk left to fill up the cracks. No coin for the starving man, No hope for their outstretched hand. Empty, always empty. It’s cold outside, I need this more than ever. An escape from reality, I need this more than ever. A place to go that’s all our homes. All equals, never alone. A brotherly bond formed by a song. He writes the words then we sing along. And I still feel empty, I still feel guilty. But they’re the feelings that I keep buried. I can’t stand the sight of a mirror. Just reminds me of who I am. I can’t stand the sound of my errors. I’m a deadshit, a terrible man. So if you love me then let me know. I’m a useless cunt with nowhere to go.
2.
Drag me down below. Down, down, down to the bottom of this bottle. Take me back home. Back, back, back to the place where I belong. Signal command take up control. The world's a pile of shit and we're living in it. Signal command take up control. Steal all the children drag them below. Wuuuaaaaaahhhh! Take me back to my birth. Take me back to my home. I want to relive all of my songs.
3.
Pathfinder 05:16
The truth is I’m finding questions hard to answer. Thoughts hard to think. I try and put two and two together But I just can’t grasp the link. They say ‘money doesn’t buy happiness’ But I’ve never seen a homeless man whos happy. And lately I’ve been thinking about death And what it means to me. It means absolutely nothing ‘Cause when I’m dead I won’t even think. Can’t regret what I haven’t. Can’t regret what I have. No remorse for my life. No cause for my death. Just another broken body. Left rotting in the street. They say I stink of desperation. Well tonight I’m going to find out, Just how desperate I can be. I’ll lay in the gutter, tie my hands to my feet. lay there for days until hunger takes me. I’m gonna pull the trigger of this gun in my face. Blow out my brains all over the place. I’m gonna fill up the bath, dive in head first. Swallow the water until my lungs burst. Gonna carry a pack across the street. Trip down and fall and let the tires take me. Tonight gonna find out just how desperate one can be.

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released August 22, 2012

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Raccoon City Adelaide, Australia

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